Bound by her purity vow, 16-year-old Quinn only indulges in kissing and heavy petting with her boyfriend Finn. The closest they got to a full sexual intercourse was the one time they made out half-naked in her parents’ jacuzzi. So imagine Finn’s shock when Quinn dropped the bombshell that she was pregnant.
What he did not know was that Quinn had already broken her chastity vow and done the deed with his best friend Puck. Ignorant about how babies are made, Finn fell hook, line and sinker for his girlfriend’s lie that his sperm had swum across the hot bath and up her vaginal tract to impregnate her.
You might have recognised this plot from the hit television series Glee. It may have been intended as a comical look at teen naivete but it also highlights the importance of sex education.
And before you dismiss it as fiction, ask any teen in Malaysia and you would be surprised at how many actually believe that it could happen.
Dr Raj: ‘Letting the young ones have sex without the right information or preparation will do more harm’
Many teens are unaware of the consequences of inappropriate touching and kissing, says psychologist Assoc Prof Dr Khaidzir Ismail from Universiti Kebangsaan Malaysia.
“Many parents and teachers are worried about adolescents having sex, but I’m more worried about other sexual activities like kissing, fondling and heavy petting among young people. These are the pre-cursors to full intercourse but many think nothing of them,” he says.
Data in the Malaysia Community and Family Study 2004 by the National Population and Family Development Board (LPPKN) – conducted every 10 years – reveal that while only 2.2 per cent of youths (aged between 15 and 24) have engaged in full intercourse, up to 26.2 per cent have indulged in kissing and heavy petting while 16.6 per cent have engaged in fondling with the opposite sex.
In a breakdown of sexual behaviour according to age, 22.2 per cent of those aged between 15 and 19 have indulged in kissing and heavy petting compared with 1.4 per cent who have had full intercourse.
Datuk Dr Raj Karim, former regional director of International Planned Parenthood Federation (IPPF) for East and South-East Asia and Oceania Region, points out that in many surveys and studies she has done, many young interviewees readily admit to kissing, heavy petting and fondling.
When asked about the consequences, many could not answer, she adds.
The lack of knowledge about the different sexual activities and their consequences among Malaysian adolescents is worrying, says Shelter Home executive director James Nayagam.
Underlining the phenomenon, he opines, is young people’s ignorance about their bodies, especially among young girls.
“With young people starting to date at an earlier age (average age of 13), many are not shy about holding hands and touching the opposite sex. As they get closer to each other, they will become bolder and soon curious about the next bases – kissing, heavy petting and full intercourse,” says Nayagam.
Unfortunately, after going all the way, he adds, many are not aware of the consequences of their action.
“That is why we have many cases of girls going through the whole term of pregnancy without realising it,” he adds, citing the case of a 16-year-old who only discovered she was pregnant after she gave birth in the toilet.
The seriousness of the situation, he says, is clearly reflected in the increase in the number of teen pregnancies. As highlighted recently in a report in The Star, 111 girls have sought help from the Welfare Department over unwanted pregnancies in the first four months of this year compared with 131 cases throughout last year and 107 in 2008.
Nayagam, like many parents and activists, believes that sex education is the answer to the growing problem.
Many eyebrows were raised when Deputy Education Minister Dr Mohd Puad Zarkashi revealed in Parliament last April that some form of sex education is already being taught in schools, and that it was initiated some two decades ago.
As he explained, it is integrated into Biology, Science, Moral Education and Islamic Studies, among others, and is adequate to meet the needs of our young.
Over the years, the curriculum has been reviewed to meet the changing needs of our students. The updates have culminated in a comprehensive set of Reproductive and Social Health Education (PKRS) modules, which was distributed to schools in 2006.
If such is indeed the case, why are cases of sexual misconduct among the young and unwanted pregnancies still on the rise?
One reason is that there are still many aspects that the modules skim through, says Dr Raj.
Much has been said about the need to be honest about the reality, but many are still reluctant to admit that the young are “doing it”, she notes.
“What many communities and societies around the world, not just Malaysia, don’t understand or don’t want to understand is that young people are sexual beings. Their sexual behaviour, feelings and emotions arise when they start their menarche (first menstrual cycle). The changes they go through are not only physical but also emotional and mental,” she explains.
Dr Raj, a former director-general of National Population and Family Planning Board (LPPKN), adds that when we talk about sex education or PKRS, we are talking about providing adolescents (aged 12 to 18) the skills and knowledge to manage their sexual, mental, and emotional changes.
And contrary to common perception, PKRS does not teach them how to have sex, she points out.
Instead, PKRS is addressing their attitude, behaviour and moral values to help them manage their sexual instincts.
“More importantly, the PKRS content is ensured to be age-appropriate or meet the evolving capacity of the individual adolescent,” she says.
This is important as each individual will have a different need – one 12-year-old may be ready for intercourse while another may not even be ready to speak to someone of the opposite sex, she adds.
Taking the different sexual behaviours seriously, Dr Raj, who was involved in the development of the modules, shares that through PKRS, they also try to instil self-respect and self-worth in young people, especially concerning where one can touch and be touched.
An important element, she says, is the knowledge that sexual relation is serious, not frivolous, and that casual sex can be dangerous and have consequences that they will regret later.
Another aspect is self-respect, including negotiation skills.
“Research shows that young people usually start having sex due to peer pressure. Many young girls are said to be coerced into sex by their boyfriends.”
PKRS, she says, can help build their characters and equip them to make the right decision.
But one burning question remains: What do we do with young people who are sexually active?
Contraception? But that is another area that seems to be glossed over in the module.
“In Malaysia, contraception is not widely talked about. Even among married couples, the use has not gone up in the last 20 years. For example, despite condoms being available at convenience stores, only 2 per cent of young people know of the method,” says Reproductive Rights Advocacy Alliance Malaysia (RRAAM) co-chair Rashidah Abdullah.
This not only leaves them vulnerable to unwanted pregnancies but also to sexually transmitted infection (STI) and HIV.
Dr Raj agrees, saying that although many of us just want to close our eyes or promote abstinence, we cannot deny the reality. “And we cannot deny the young the information because not preparing them will have massive consequences. We cannot stop them from having sex at a young age, and letting the young ones have sex without the right information or preparation will do more harm.”
The dilemma, she adds, is whether we want them to continue to have unsafe and unprotected sex and have unwanted pregnancies or catch STI, or provide them with the knowledge and skills to protect themselves during sex.
“I strongly believe that they need to be counselled and given the appropriate services so that they will not endanger their lives,” she argues.
Training needed
Nayagam, who was involved in the development of the PKRS modules, argues that the real problem with the implementation of PKRS is the shortage of skilled teachers.
“Many teachers I talked to say they are not prepared to teach it. They say they are not trained for it.”
That is part of the problem, echoes National Union of the Teaching Profession (NUTP) secretary-general Lok Yim Pheng.
“Teachers need to be trained well to enable them to teach PKRS effectively. What we need is for teachers to receive the appropriate training on the content and teaching methodology,” she says.
Dr Khaidzir stresses the need to make sex sound less exotic among students, something that teachers will have to be prepared to do.
“PKRS is not a subject that we can impart using chalk and blackboard. It has to be interactive and involve a lot of frank discussions between the teacher and students.”
But it is difficult when both sides are too embarrassed to talk about it, he says.
Dr Raj proposes that schools collaborate with health professionals like nurses, or related NGOs, to run PKRS sessions.
“Many countries are doing this because students are shy with their teachers or are scared that they will be judgmental. PKRS will be less effective because no one will be open about what they are curious to know or share their real sexual experiences frankly. We want them to ask questions about sex openly without fear or shame,” she says, adding that the “professionals” will also be equipped with the necessary medical background to deal with the difficult questions on pregnancy and STIs.
This strategy will definitely help address the issue of teacher shortage and ease their burden, says Lok.
“Training of teachers will also take a long time, particularly as we already have a shortage of teachers and they are bogged down with other teaching and administrative responsibilities.”
Another strategy is peer counselling. According to Dr Raj, this is currently the most popular method worldwide.
“When young people get into trouble, they will talk to their friends. Young people are more comfortable talking to other young people, so peer counselling is effective.”
The Federation of Reproductive Health Associations Malaysia (FRHAM) is one non-governmental organisation which practises this, she notes.
Lok feels that although the PKRS modules are relatively comprehensive, they might still need to be updated.
“I think, looking at the situation of teenagers today, we would need to relook the modules in terms of content. For one, we would need to deal with their increased access to the Internet. There is so much pornographic material online, as well as information on sex, so young people need to be trained to manage the information,” she says.
“Instead of rewriting the content, we can train teachers and students to use the information available on the Internet to update their knowledge and skills on PKRS.”
Source: H. Azizan, The Star Online (Malaysia), 18 July 2010